I don’t know if this is true or not (and frankly, it sounds suspicious). And I can’t give proper credit to whoever this story comes from because I have no idea who that might be. Nevertheless, it is a good story. Apparently, a new club that featured exotic dancers was nearing its grand opening. Half-a-mile down the road was a very active church that was deeply concerned about the influence this club would have on their community if it opened. And so, they began to hold regular prayer meetings to pray against the club. One week before the club opened officially, they decided it would be wise to conduct a prayer walk around the building site, both as a form of prayer and of protest. Their march even made the news. Interestingly, two days after the club opened, lightning struck the building and the club burned to the ground. The owner brought a lawsuit against the church claiming they were responsible for the damage. The church hired an attorney to defend themselves against such a baseless accusation. As the case began to gain notoriety, a journalist wrote: “No matter how this case is decided, one thing is clear. The bar owner believes in prayer, and the Christians do not.” 

I fear the journalist is making an excellent point here. Most churches are good at going through the motions of prayer; but when it really comes to believing in prayer, I think we all fall flat. If we truly believed in prayer, I think we would see more people delight themselves in prayer. I think we would see healthier churches. And I think most churches would invest themselves heavily in prayer. But as I look around, I don’t see it. Yes, we believe in prayer intellectually, but we don’t trust our hearts in prayer. Let’s face it, prayer remains one of the great weaknesses of the church today (even our church). But I get that. While prayer sounds easy, we all know it is actually one of the most difficult of all the spiritual disciplines. Years ago, I heard someone say, “Prayer is not preparation for the battle; prayer is the battle.” I firmly believe that. Prayer is hard work. And if we want to grow in our ability to pray and to pray well, we will need to prepare ourselves for the hard work that is ahead.

These are the seven characteristics that we at River’s Edge use to define and evaluate our involvement in this last core strength:

  • I am spending sufficient time in prayer, solitude and in listening to God speak through his Word.
  • I find myself often praying the prayers in the Psalms and in the New Testament to remind myself of what is really important in prayer.
  • My prayer life is in proper alignment with the emphases and priorities of the Lord’s Prayer.
  • I am able to surrender myself to God’s will and do so with a sense of contentment and peace and joy.
  • I find myself praying more for the wants and need others than for my own desires.  
  • When I pray, I feel God’s presence and love surrounding me.
  • I am growing more and more in gratitude, in praise and in worship.

Usually, our list of qualities is self-explanatory, but our second item may raise some questions. To defend this characteristic, I would like for us to consider these four quotes from Dietrich Bonhoeffer from his spectacular book, Psalms: The Prayer Book of the Bible. These quotes always speak to my heart. I hope they also speak to yours, as well.  

“We must learn to pray. The child learns to speak because the parent speaks to the child. The child learns the language of the parent. So we learn to speak to God because God has spoken and speaks to us. In the language of the Father in heaven, God’s children learn to speak with God. Repeating God’s own words, we begin to pray to God. We ought to speak to God, and God wishes to hear us, not in the false and confused language of our heart but in the clear and pure language that God has spoken to us in Christ. Thus, it does not matter whether the [Scriptures] express exactly what we feel in our heart at the moment we pray. Perhaps, it is precisely the case that we must pray against our own heart in order to pray rightly. It is not just that for which we ourselves want to pray that is important, but that for which God wants us to pray.” 

“The more deeply we grow into the psalms and the more often we pray them as our own, the more simple and rich will our prayer become.”

“But it is a dangerous error, surely very widespread among Christians, to think that the heart can pray by itself. For then, we confuse wishes, hopes, sighs, laments, rejoicings—all of which the heart can do by itself—with prayer. And we confuse earth and heaven, man and God. Prayer does not mean simply to pour out one’s heart. It means rather to find the way to God and to speak with him, whether the heart is full or empty. No man can do that by himself. For that he needs Jesus Christ.”

“Whatever is included in the petitions of the Lord’s prayer is prayed aright: whatever is not included is no prayer. All the prayers of Holy Scripture are summarized in the Lord’s Prayer.”

With these thoughts in mind, let’s get to work on developing a heart of prayer. There are six steps. By now, you know them well. If you need help, I’ve included the instructions below, but if you are ready to go, feel free to skip the guidelines.

First, SURVEY and PRAY. 

Reread the seven items in today’s category and evaluate each of them compared to how you have grown in the last year. Give each a numerical value. If you have lost ground, give yourself a one. If you have stagnated, give yourself a two. If you are growing slowly, give yourself a three. If you are growing steadily, give yourself a four. And if you are discovering new breakthroughs, give yourself a five.

Pray that God would lead you through this process and reveal to you how you are doing in your prayer life. Let God reinforce your strengths and show you your growth areas. Receive both with thanksgiving.  

Second, SELECT and DETECT.

Select two of the seven items for you to work on this week and write them down in a prominent place. Again, pray that God would give you opportunities to work on these two items this week.  

Now, as you go throughout your week, you are to detect those opportunities that God has prepared for you (Ephesians 2:10). Our privilege is to seek as many ways as we can to put these two items into practice. Our task here is found in being aware of opportunities as they come our way (remember they come at us fast). 

Third, EMBODY and EMBRACE.

Here is the crucial moment. When we see these opportunities before us, we must step out in faith and embody these skills. God has not given us these opportunities only to see them, but to do them. The key here is to keep these two items in the foreground of your thinking and in your prayers all week long and to believe that God is going to show up dramatically. And when God opens that door, our job is to step through it; and as many times as God opens a door, we are to step through it. And with each successful step, we should give thanks to God for working in us so that we can grow in grace.  

But our task is not just to embody these two principles, but to embrace a lifestyle of all of our qualities. We want to be . . .

  • a people driven by grace. 
  • a people who invest in loving relationships. 
  • a people who share their faith with others joyfully.
  • a people who are called to grow in faith.
  • a people who understand that we grow only as we give ourselves away. 
  • a people who are authentic, open and honest.
  • a people who are relevant and able to engage our culture in rich, moving and meaningful ways.  

And today, we add to this list two items from our last core value:

  • a people who give themselves to God in prayer.

In other words, there are nine items on our agenda today (seven from the previous weeks and two from today).  The key for us is to put all of these items into action in this upcoming week and to invest yourself in prayer more fully. It is not easy, but it is crucial for our growth in Christ. 

But remember, prayer is hard work. There’s a great story that Saint Augustine shared about his own prayer life. In his book, Confessions, Augustine talks about a prayer that he offered to God when he was younger. He knew what he should pray. He knew what was right. He knew that he needed to grow and change. And so, he prayed, “O Lord, give me self-control so that I am no longer a prisoner of my lust and enable me to become sexually pure.” It was a noble prayer. But when he prayed it, he realized what all he would need to give up if God answered it. And in a panic, he added this exclamation: “But not yet!” So often we pray, and while we want God to answer our prayer, we don’t want him to do so too soon and ruin our plans. See, the secret of prayer is a willingness to surrender our requests, our wants and our will to God and to trust him with our hearts. It’s not easy, but prayer never is. That’s why Kierkegaard said, “Prayer is a silent surrendering of everything to God.”  To that end, let us all pray.